The Coloring Book

 

This morning, in honor of the super moon, I did a spell to release the things I don't like about my life. Then I started thinking about what I do like. Then I realized that I don't want a radically different life; I just want to tweak a few things. And I remembered the coloring book.

I started a quilter's coloring book a very long time ago. I'm not sure what year, but I'm pretty sure at that time, I was living in my ratty, single-wide trailer in the county seat. It has been on my mind for a while, that I should do something with that project. So this morning I found my designs; I started working on this again in July of 2023. I got out out one design. I made copies to color. Possibly, I designed some fabric around this one block. And then...? I'm not sure. Maybe I got busy with other things. Maybe I couldn't be in the studio while leaving my teenagers unattended in the house because they were vaping. Maybe my husband said it was a dumb idea and I got discouraged. Maybe my design did not look the way I envisioned. 

Whatever happened, I had forgotten my plan to start again. I forgot my log book, which is the only reason I know I was trying to work on the coloring book in July, 2023. 

I don't really know what to do next. I'm pretty sure I should start scanning the original blocks I drew. It looks like I already did that, but I don't know why those aren't on my computer. Maybe I had already scanned and designed quilts with the blocks? 

I have a lot of unfinished projects. Sometimes, I resolve to finish them. I start digging in boxes. I find a lot of things that are almost complete. Like, one more tiny step and it's done. I wonder why I stopped. Was I overwhelmed? Tired? The deadline passed by? Ran out of money to buy more fabric? Had to move and needed to pack? Reached the limit of my skill set, but now, 20 years later, I know more techniques so the project seems much easier now than then? Had I already invested so much time that I just couldn't bear another minute? 

Maybe that's just life. It goes on despite my plans. Sometimes I get another chance and other times I take whatever is leftover to make something new, that I wouldn't have thought of under different circumstances.

So I have the coloring book. I'm just going to blog about it. Maybe I publish it. Maybe I just make blocks. Guess I'll find out.

Blessed be, my dears. Stay safe.

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